Quote:
Originally posted by meghal
Quote:
Originally posted by mails4sagar
Makes me wonder........How many "desis" hire "goras" in their businesses ???
I have seen a case where a desi grocery store in Brampton has hired a mentally challenged caucasian girl.
The owner of the store refers to the girl as "beti" atleast in presence of grocers. But once I saw the daughter of the owner yelling at that girl. After that incident I have stopped shopping at that grocery store.
I have been a victim of bigotry some times, but nobody has treated me badly or yelled at me or insulted me on the job. Atleast the "goras" have that ability to "act nicely" in your presence.
Meghal
I have experienced more racism from my so called "fellow countrymen" than anybody else. This story has been narrated enough times to those who know me so I won't get into specifics.
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Quote:
Originally posted by Pink Panther
Before living in Canada, I lived in the UK all my life. The last time I felt the hurtful pangs of this kind of backward thinking was when I was a child in school, which is expected because kids will say the most horrible things. But to feel it again here in this country, in this day and age, from adults, is really eye opening and dissapointing to me.
PP, what you say is true and there are bigots everywhere. If you think about it the number of bigots from India itself with their baggage of chauvinism(religious/gender/caste/skin-color etc) is huge.
Some questions we have to ask ourselves when dealing with such people is.
1) Are their actions directly stopping us from getting ahead? e.g: promotion etc.
2) If the effects are indirect(mental well-being)...are we giving them the power over us that they do not deserve? Afterall their actions are out of ignorance/weakness. Why give them any credibility? Why make their problem YOUR problem?
If its just the latter...try not to squash them on your way up
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Posted on: 19-06-06 11:50:04
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Posted on: 19-06-06 11:50:04
Quote:
Originally posted by jake3d
Quote:
Originally posted by Pink Panther
Before living in Canada, I lived in the UK all my life. The last time I felt the hurtful pangs of this kind of backward thinking was when I was a child in school, which is expected because kids will say the most horrible things. But to feel it again here in this country, in this day and age, from adults, is really eye opening and dissapointing to me.
1) Are their actions directly stopping us from getting ahead? e.g: promotion etc.
2) If the effects are indirect(mental well-being)...are we giving them the power over us that they do not deserve? Afterall their actions are out of ignorance/weakness. Why give them any credibility? Why make their problem YOUR problem?
If its just the latter...try not to squash them on your way up
Thanks Jake,
It's definately #2, and although it's a little bit of a struggle to have to deal with this, I'm not leaving my job because of it, and I'm (trying really hard) not bringing my anger about it home with me.
I realize that one day, I'll most likely end up moving back to Toronto...and hopefully get transfered to the corporate office. (Where, by the way, you see an indian at every turn of the building
It's sheer ignorance and you're right, it's their problem, not mine.
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Quote:
Originally posted by Pink Panther
It's definately #2, and although it's a little bit of a struggle to have to deal with this, I'm not leaving my job because of it, and I'm (trying really hard) not bringing my anger about it home with me.
I realize that one day, I'll most likely end up moving back to Toronto...and hopefully get transfered to the corporate office. (Where, by the way, you see an indian at every turn of the building
It's sheer ignorance and you're right, it's their problem, not mine.
If its just #2:
Dont let them change you
or your lifestyle. That's what they want. I know someone who refuses to change the way she behaves with people who are openly mean to her. Often the other person HAS to change because they do not get any of the desired reactions from this lady. Her logic is 'why give them the satisfaction of letting them know they have got the better of me even if they have'
. Ofcourse, this means that they almost NEVER regain trust in her books again. Tough lady. Ignoring them does not mean that you dont know what they really are
. The onus to change is on them...not you.
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Posted on: 19-06-06 12:10:28
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Posted on: 19-06-06 12:10:28
Quote:
Originally posted by jake3d
If its just #2:
Dont let them change you
Her logic is 'why give them the satisfaction of letting them know they have got the better of me even if they have'
Ignoring them does not mean that you dont know what they really are
The onus to change is on them...not you.
Yes, right now ignoring this is the only thing I can do. Nothing that is said or done is directed to me...it is all very indirect which makes it harder to address.
Anyway, thanks for the inspiring words Jake
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Quote:
Originally posted by Pink Panther
Yes, right now ignoring this is the only thing I can do. Nothing that is said or done is directed to me...it is all very indirect which makes it harder to address.
If you want them to know you dont want to hear that talk, Just laugh along with her and the other bigots(if any) and say " If I did not know you I would think you are ignorant to say something bigoted like that" and then keep smiling.
Hopefully, they will continue out of your hearing.
I once had a colleague(who is a good friend now), who commented " So you are Indian with gods with elephant heads and many arms". I laughed along and said " Yes, some of us have those while others worship symbols of torture and pain with people dangling from crosses, I cannot decide which is better since both are part of my heritage".
He got the mssg.
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Posted on: 19-06-06 12:44:25
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Posted on: 19-06-06 12:44:25
Quote:
Originally posted by jake3d
I once had a colleague(who is a good friend now), who commented " So you are Indian with gods with elephant heads and many arms". I laughed along and said " Yes, some of us have those while others worship symbols of torture and pain with people dangling from crosses, I cannot decide which is better since both are part of my heritage".
He got the mssg.
LOL, that's a good one!
My hubby says the same thing too...you have to kinda play them at their own game.
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