Indian abused women knocking door for help.
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Quote:
Originally posted by gopalpai
I told them, but they don't wish to get involved with police because they want to patch up with husbands and if they call cops, the situations will worsens. typical indian woman mentality. I feel they are very foolish to leave house at night say 9-10 pm and that too with small children in hand and no money. They call their old parents after leaving and poor parents must be worried to death till they reach India.
I told them about a case, whereby the lady was brought to canada after marriage and her husband used to bring prostitutes in the house and enjoy in front of spouse and how one prostitute asked the wife to call police and police came and slapped the drunk husband and they are separated and she enjoys going to college and parties and the husband bears all her expenses of studies and parties. She said she is punishing him for torturing her and one day he came and begged her to reduce her expenses and she promised him that she will increase and wants to see him penniless and begging on the road. She said he will pay for spoiling her life.
Some people/spouse deserve to suffer if they can't take the responsibilities seriously. Not all women are bold enough to take such bold decisions.
Hi gopalpai,
i am curious and surprise to hear your experiences that too u just landed few months back.
its been almost 12yrs and have not seen and heard the stories that you are mentioning here.
well coin has both sides and you might have heard only one side and suggest you not to jump on conclusions and not to get involved in such cases.
btw..why i was mentioning this, women are not that innocent and not knowing how to protect them..atleast not knowing about 911(sincerely doubt it)..
well nothing against ...but i know personally that one of my friend got victimized by a spouse and enjoying the victizmized benefits along with new boyfriend and the poor guy is suffereing ..
well..conclusion is not to get involved and not to escalate the family issues here, as every one knows with one single call(911) things will be there to help the victim.
If you still think they dont know..then just tell them to call the police instead of knocking your door in the night time...
cheers
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MK
thanks cd's for your help and advise. I have helped them reach their destination i.e India with their parents and I am happy they safe and happy.
I know this lady cut her vein being a doctor and tried to commit suicide and police was called and later on she changed her statement telling she was depressed etc. I somehow feel happy to help a life and reach her safely to her parents. she also was new immigrant landed 5 months back.
still, I shall take your advise in future and tell them to call 911. I always feel you all are my well wishers and will guide me in right way.
thanks once again.
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The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.”
Mahatma Gandhi
Quote:
Originally posted by gopalpai
thanks cd's for your help and advise. I have helped them reach their destination i.e India with their parents and I am happy they safe and happy.
I know this lady cut her vein being a doctor and tried to commit suicide and police was called and later on she changed her statement telling she was depressed etc. I somehow feel happy to help a life and reach her safely to her parents. she also was new immigrant landed 5 months back.
still, I shall take your advise in future and tell them to call 911. I always feel you all are my well wishers and will guide me in right way.
thanks once again.
So how exactly you helped? Did you help the 'doctor/software professionals' by showing them how to dial 911? Or did you educate the 'rich high class women' on how they can get money from their rich parents in India using Western Union or hundred other different ways if they are really in such bad condition.
Quote:
Originally posted by gopalpai
We have most of the time talked good/bad about canada. Let me write something worst about canada apart from new immigrants suffering and struggling, the people who are already settled down still working on labour jobs after 5 years etc.etc.
I have been here only four months and last month and this month I have 2 very high class rich women married to Indian canadian who are abused and leaving the house with small children knocking my door asking for help till they make arrangement to leave for India. I was shocked about their story.
These are the ladies who are profession like doctors,software professionals etc who are very rich and have flats in Hiranandani complex and evershine building in bandra and andheri where only rich Indians reside.
can somebody tell me how to handle such situations without affecting us personally and our family life. I have even heard that punjabis and sikhs etc get married and bring newly married wife and ask them to earn their own living to survive. They even tell their new wife to go and do labour jobs. Poor ladies are shocked and one of my known person put them in kitchen cutting and cooking work. This has been happening for quite a long time time. I have heard these stories from ladies who are here since 2-3 decades.
Hi Gopalpai,
You are just wasting yours and others time by putting meaningless posts like this. Most of your posts just sucks. Now you will reply back saying that I do not need to read your posts or write any comments. But had to let you know.
God Bless you.
Location: God's own country
Posted on: 21-09-09 09:03:51
Quote:
Originally posted by gopalpaithanks cd's for your help and advise. I have helped them reach their destination i.e India with their parents and I am happy they safe and happy.
I know this lady cut her vein being a doctor and tried to commit suicide and police was called and later on she changed her statement telling she was depressed etc. I somehow feel happy to help a life and reach her safely to her parents. she also was new immigrant landed 5 months back.
still, I shall take your advise in future and tell them to call 911. I always feel you all are my well wishers and will guide me in right way.
thanks once again.
Gopal Pai,
You fail to give us the reason for this action. What was the exact situation?
Did the spouse ill treat the doctor? Did the doctor get depressed due to non recognition of her Indian credentials in Canada? Did the spouse force her 9A doctor) to do labour jobs in canada so that they could pay taxes which in turn benefited the Canadian society? was the Doctor ill treated b'cos she could not produce an off spring? Or did the husband ill treat her for the lack of dowry that her parents failed to give in India and he settled scores in Canada knowing that the doctors brother/ in laws could not beat him in Canada?
There can be so many reasons. Unless we know the reason, we canot come to a conclusion.
In general :
canada offers equal chance in any despute (though a Toronto star report cited access to information showed that Cops in Canada favoured the women more than men. An example is taht if the cops were called home for a domestic dispute, tehy would almost all the time ask the male-husband (rather than the female) to leave the house and come back the next day when tempers were cooled down). There is no harm in being involved or trying to solve a family despute if you are prepared for the following.
1. testifying in court. You can be subopenoed which means that it is a compulsion.
2. Be prepared for any lawsuit (if at all there is), by the opposite party stating taht you were the reason for the fight happeneing in the first place
3. In case of any violence happening, explain to the cops that you were not a party to it.
This is unlike India where people refuse to get involved if it is a fight between a husband and wife. This is also unlike India, where the brothers of the wife can beat up the husband for illtreating his wife and the police will refuse to get involved. In Canada, once police are called, they will make sure that the problem is solved (some times going to the extreme like the child society removing your children for their safe upkeep etc...)
choices are in your hands. if it is a simple misunderstanding, I see no harm in you giving shelter for a night and the husband calls up to patch up in the morning. But in cases like cutting a vein and all that is too dangerous as repercusions are many.
I know for a fact that many Indian born husbands ill-treat their wifes (wife mostly uneducated). I know of an Instance where as one vet. doctor beat his wife with a broom (wife was the daughter of a doctor but 12 th std pass) and she had to get stiches on the head. She refused to call police as she was waiting for her younger sister to get married and once that happened se ran away and married her house owner in Malton. I have heard (only heard from reliable sources) that many Indian born men in Brampton / malton ill treat their wifes (This has also been documented in the Toronto star) and the wife's just keep their mouth shut as they are not much educated and b'cos of children's future.
The choice is in your hands whether to help or not. Choose and choose wisely. Be aware of Canadian laws, norms, social happening, Canadian culture etc... before helping anyone or before refusing help to anyone.
Hope this sheds some light on the situation.
Peace by TK
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I am a Gents and not a Ladies.
before giving such rude replies, think, pray god it is not your daughter or your sister who is facing such situation. Try to be little human. After giving such replies please don't write GOD BLESS YOU. Its spoils the whole effect of your rude msg.
I am posting one thread posted by spaceman and I let you all cd's decide which is post which is important and which is meaningless. I think he feels him eating amul butter is more important than saving a life and giving shelter to needy people.
Amul Butter
Hi,
I have been to many Indian Grocery stores in Mississauga/Brampton area, but never found Amul Butter. Do fellow CD's know where can i look for it?
spaceman, hope you get my msg. be careful in future.
P.S. TK, thank you very much for your sincere advise.
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The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.”
Mahatma Gandhi
Location: British Columbia
Posted on: 21-09-09 10:30:52
The nature of a forum such as this one is that people will always have differing opinions, and the right to question other's posts and comments. This isnt always negative, as it helps us grow and change, and become more aware of how we perceive the world around us.
Having said that, CD has a policy against personal attacks and quoting another thread by "spaceman", that has no bearing on this discussion, but used to discredit the writer IS in my opinion a personal attack.
Please keep this discussion free of personal attacks or I will lock the thread.
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~ Morning rain
