Girl #1: "My boyfriend just cheated on me."
Girl #2: "Holy s***! Which one?"
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After the Great Britain Beer Festival, in London, all the brewery presidents decided to go out for a beer. The guy from Corona sits down and says, "Hey Señor, I would like the world's best beer, a Corona."

The bartender dusts off a bottle from the shelf and gives it to him. The guy from Budweiser says, "I'd like the best beer in the world, give me 'The King Of Beers', a Budweiser."

The bartender gives him one. The guy from Coors says, "I'd like the only beer made with Rocky Mountain spring water, give me a Coors."

He gets it. The guy from Guinness sits down and says, "Give me a Coke."

The bartender is a little taken aback, but gives him what he ordered. The other brewery presidents look over at him and ask, "Why aren't you drinking a Guinness?"

The Guinness president replies, "Well, if you guys aren't drinking beer, neither will I."

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A father found his small son looking very unhappy.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

The boy said, "I can't get along with your wife."

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A psychiatrist was trying to comfort a new patient who was terribly upset. "You see, Doc," the patient explained, "my problem is that I like shoes much better than I like boots."

"Why, that’s no problem," answered the doctor. "Most people like shoes better than boots."

The patient was thrilled, "That’s neat, Doc! How do you like them, fried or scrambled?"

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I think animal testing is a terrible idea; they get all nervous and give the wrong answers."

---Joseph Blosephina

Hilarious, thanks for sharing...

Trinity