A typical conversation with a visiting NRI

Self: Hi! Home for a holiday? Are you going back.or?

NRI: Yes yesI am going back as soon as possible.

Self: But your parents are here. There are also many new malls now where you can get everything you want. It's even cheaper than in the US, Europe or Canada or Australia.

NRI: Yes. things are real cheap here in India products are very goodthe malls are also very good.restaurants are excellent. But the roads and the traffic are so terrible I can't wait to get back.

Self: Yes I agree but that's only one relatively small factorsurely you can adjust and put up with that. The situation would improve once the Metro is operational.

NRI: No No. Why should I put up with the traffic and the crowds and the garbage? Why should I adjust? It's impossible.

Self: OK lets change the subject. How are your parents? I heard your mother/father had some health problem. Is she/he ok now?

NRI: Oh yeah she's/he’s ok! Doctors have given her/him some medicines. Dad/Mom is there to take care of her/him.

Self: But he/she is old how will he/she manage? Besides, both will be missing all of you so much. Loneliness is terrible. That itself can lead to so many diseases.

NRI: He'll/She’ll manage. He/She has to adjust, I guess.

Self: OK. how is life in America? What do you eat at home?. The usual Idlis, Dosas Upma etc. that you like so much? Indian food, particularly South Indian food is considered the healthiest! It contains all essential nutrients in a very balanced way.

NRI: Well no not really. We normally eat cereals for breakfast straight from boxes. I carry sandwiches for lunch or eat some salad at the cafeteria (everything is so expensive). For dinner we take out some food stored in the freezer and heat it in the microwave and that's it. Its difficult to cook every day, you know so we cook once a week and store it in the freezer.

Self: But that's not healthy. Also, eating packaged & processed food every day could lead to many diseases. We read about this every day.

NRI: Oh no problem. We adjust. We sometimes eat meat to make up for the proteins.
Self: But you are traditionally a vegetarian, I thought. Vegetarianism is considered a better option for general health, animal rights and for spiritual reasons. and many westerners are now becoming vegetarians. Sowhy have you switched to non-veg?

NRI: Well its no big deal really. One has to adjust.

Self: It must be cold where you live.you have lived all your life in warm South India.

NRI: Yes its terribly cold out there with months of snow but we have central heating. We don't go out much but its...ok. We learn to adjust.

Self: How is your wife? Does she also work? What about the children?

NRI: Of course! She has to work! We can't manage with one person working. We have mortgages to pay. We both leave our home at 8 am and are back at 6 pm. We have only one child who comes from school and stays alone till we come home. He watches TV and eats something from the freezer. Some of our friends are even opting not to have any children so that they could save all the trouble. God!.Children are such a responsibility!

Self: Yes that they certainly are.

NRI: Children are also very expensive. Their clothes, food, eating out, vacations buying new stuff every few months just to keep up with their peers in school its terrible!

Self: So how do you manage? What about the culture? The s**ual freedom, p**nography, homos**uality and so on? Aren't you worried about these adverse influences on your children?

NRI: No one bothers about all that. Its part of life. If my son adopts that lifestyle that's ok with me. We need to adjust and get on with life.

Self: I understand that due to the recession and its aftermath there is a subtle antagonism towards foreigners and immigrants. Is that true?

NRI: Well yeah sometimes you do sense a mild discrimination and bigotry. Recently in fact, someone shouted out an abuse at my wife when she was out shopping. Someone at school called out ‘Paki go home' to my son. But these things are rare because by and large, we keep to ourselves. We rarely interact with the whites or the other immigrants. Even they prefer to keep to themselves. We have our own small Indian groups with whom we socialize. So such racist incidents are kept to the minimum. We adjust and learn to manage.

Self : What about entertainment? Do you get Indian TV channels and programs? Do you eat out often?

NRI: Indian channels are usually pay channels and very expensive. So we don't have them. We manage with the local english programs. We do see Indian movies sometimes. They are expensive and you need to drive for an hour to get to the cinema hall. So we don't do it very often. Eating out is very expensive. Indian food is even more expensive.

Self: Where do you live in the US and do you own a house?

NRI: We live in a locality with lot of Hispanics, Koreans and Chinese. We have bought a house on mortgage recently. Its not very big actually. Just a two bedroom twin home of about 800 sq ft. Unfortunately prices have dropped recently. But we like it.

Self: But you have a fairly big home in India...

NRI: Yes but.what have I got in India? Nothing!

Self: What do you do if one of you is ill? Do any neighbors help?

NRI: Actuallyone of my neighbors is a Korean man who lives with his girlfriend. On the other side are twoer.homos**ual men. We have to help ourselves most of the time. Our Indian friends live some distance away.and no one will help if we are ill. Everyone is so busy with their own work.

Self: What sort of work do you do in the US? Is it some highly specialized cutting edge work. for which you cannot get a job in India?

NRI: Actually.I am a software engineer. I had a good job till recently, but I got laid off and had a terrible three months. I have recently been called for an interview for a temporary contract position. I may get it. Things are looking goodyeah.I am ok!

Self: But you would be able to get a very good highly paying job in India. India's booming with a very high rate of growth!

NRI: YesI know. I'll probably get a much better salary than what I get in the US and maybe I'll be able to save much more too but it's so difficult to adjust to the traffic and the crowds in India you know. Its impossible to come back.

Self: OK then. goodbye and good luck!

(I think to myself as I say goodbye) Yeah.. right! You can adjust to packaged food and poor health, small dark wooden home, heavy mortgages, terrible weather conditions, lack of family, lonely parents, bad cultural environment, racial abuse, loss of dignity & self respect, job insecurity and even your basic principles but you can't adjust to simple traffic conditions in India!

How incongruous can you get!

\"Make sure you visualize what you really want,
not what someone else wants for you : Jerry Gillies\"

\"The Happiest people DO NOT necessarily the BEST things,
They simply APPRECIATE the thing they have\"


update:
Disclaimer Note : This is fun section. If you like the post enjoy it otherwise ignore it. Poster is not responsible for the contents.

Pointy!
But here are the actuals:
Self: But your parents are here. There are also many new malls now where you can get everything you want. It's even cheaper than in the US, Europe or Canada or Australia.

NRI: Bringing the parents over. In fact they enjoy the clean air walk around park and peace. If not on PR/GC Visa rules are flexible. Indian grocery you get here is much better quality (witout bhesal) and affordable. Malls in India still a lot expensive. Feels like a poor when I even try to shop there.
And of course traffic.

Self: OK lets change the subject. How are your parents? I heard your mother/father had some health problem. Is she/he ok now?
NRI: The main reason for health issue is pollution, no fresh air not even at 4:00 AM local time. The heat is unbearable. Got them here for 6 months and they are better than the time when they were at Baba Ramdev's camp.

Self: OK. how is life in America? What do you eat at home?. The usual Idlis, Dosas Upma etc. that you like so much? Indian food, particularly South Indian food is considered the healthiest! It contains all essential nutrients in a very balanced way.
NRI: With so many Indians around, the life is like in India but arguable better. Eat Dosa, poha, upma,brar samosa, and of course fresh fruits which has become a rare commodity in India. Eating out is feast with Gurulaxmi, Tandoori times and bunch of other restaurants around GTA, it is great (and you are not forced to tip , in India arrogant waiter puts the tip back in your pocket if hez not happy)

Self: It must be cold where you live.you have lived all your life in warm South India.
NRI: I can handle cold but cannot handle the heat which is increasing year over year.

Self: How is your wife? Does she also work? What about the children?
NRI: Yep, she would have worked in India..but not 8 hours definitely 10-12 hour per day 6-7 days a week. Here children at least have decent before/after school programs. There it is still a trial and error.

Self: So how do you manage? What about the culture? The s**ual freedom, p**nography, homos**uality and so on? Aren't you worried about these adverse influences on your children?
NRI: To my surprise, the children of same age in India are much more exposed to these. Especially regulations are still catching up with the changes in technology.

Self: I understand that due to the recession and its aftermath there is a subtle antagonism towards foreigners and immigrants. Is that true?
NRI: Not really, I would say here in GTA it is more otherway round.

Self : What about entertainment? Do you get Indian TV channels and programs? Do you eat out often?
NRI: Yep, we have FTA installed, thanks to US satellites and Dish network


Self: What do you do if one of you is ill? Do any neighbors help?
NRI: Thank gor they don't. I simply visit tylenol doctor, take rest coupla days and then I am good to go. Otherwise neighbours would have started sharing the experiences "oh meri chacheri bahen ke mausere bhai ko same bimari ho gayi aur woh bechara 10 din me tapak gaya"

Self: What sort of work do you do in the US? Is it some highly specialized cutting edge work. for which you cannot get a job in India?
NRI: I get paid more than the execs in India, and execs in India still listens to my orders despite being lower in the rank.

Self: But you would be able to get a very good highly paying job in India. India's booming with a very high rate of growth!
NRI: But look at the rupee..ever since it got new symbol it never stopped sliding down, salaries doubled but still can't afford to buy 10 gms of gold. All the boom is for corrupt politicians.

Self: OK then. goodbye and good luck!
NRI: Same to you!

sad but true. India is not getting better. Its getting worse. All the boom is really money making for only politicians. see the number of scams. they're not going to stop. Population is increasing. Already there are water problems. It will increase in future. What about food security ? In the name of food security, Companies like Monsanto are waiting to sell their Genetically modified seeds and capture the Indian agriculture sector. Thanks to Mr. Sharad Pawar, Our Hon'ble Agriculture minister. God knows how much money has been already made. Yes roads and bridges are being built but cars are growing at a faster pace so more roads, more cars, more pollution. no cycling paths, no footpaths. No open space in Mumbai for children to play. children don't get vitamin d inspite of so much sunshine because no good grounds to play. if the government is not interested in creating sustainable infrastructure and decongesting the cities, slowing the population flow, protect resources for the future, improve the quality of life, how will it improve in the future ? it has taken Anna Hazare so much time to get so little done. what will happen after him ?

seenimesh - will you be kind enough to tell us - Canadian Desis, where you live?


Where did you hear that "That (loneliness) itself can lead to so many diseases"? I googled, but did not find anything. Can please post more information about this?

Thanks!

Self: OK lets change the subject. How are your parents? I heard your mother/father had some health problem. Is she/he ok now?

NRI : Well, what to say, you suggested last time that they will be better in India. I took them to India, doctor was good but the medicine which we bought were fake and counterfeit....