Catch up some sleep

A man returns from the doctor and tells his wife that the doctor has told him he has only 24 hours to live. Given this prognosis, the man asks his wife for sex. Naturally, she agrees, and they make love.
About six hours later, the husband goes to his wife and says, "Honey, you know I now have only 18 hours to live. Could we please do it one more time?"
Of course, the wife agrees, and they do it again. Later, as the man gets into bed, he looks at his watch and realizes that he now has only 8 hours left.
He touches his wife`s shoulder, and asks "Honey, please... just one more time before I die."
She says, "Of course, Dear," and they make love for the third time.
After this session, the wife rolls over and falls asleep. The man, however, worried about his impending death, tosses and turns, until he`s down to 4 more hours.
He taps his wife, who rouses. "Honey, I have only 4 more hours. Do you think we could......."
This time the wife sits up and says, "Listen, I have to get up in the morning. You don`t !"

A Priest kept chickens at his village. One evening the cock went missing.
At the church mass prayer gathering, the priest asked, - "Who has a cock?"
... All the men got up.
"No, I meant who has seen a cock?"
... All the women got up.
"No, No, Who has seen a cock that isn't their's?"
... Half the women got up.
"Oh, for Heaven's sake, Who has seen my cock?"
... All the nuns got up...

-----------------------------------------------------------------
A Delhite in Toronto