Very good post and an equally good reply by Bhishma, I must say.

I think it is important to note here that there is no mathematically right or wrong decision. The right decision is the one that suits your situation the best. If you are happy with the way this will work out, then it is the best decision for you, whether someone else applauds or rejects it is irrelevant.

But like Bhishma commented, 10-15 years these days is an impossibly long time to objectively anticipate and thus chalk on a board. Granted, the mid-east right now is a great place for making money. But with the amount of disturbance there right now, will it be so forever? Or will it even be so for a whole year? Nobody knows. And is there any guaranteed way of saying that you will not land a great job in a couple of months if you moved to Canada right now? Nope.

But I think you have done a really good job in choosing what you feel most comfortable with. Yes, the market here if you're over 40 is quite challenging and if your primary objective in settling here is for your daughter to have a Canadian education and future, then this makes a lot of sense. And if things go according to plan, you will retire with enough finances to sustain you very comfortably for the rest of your lives, regardless of where you retire.

My best wishes that things work out according to your plan. Again, let me commend you on your extremely articulate post and I do hope you will keep visiting Canadiandesi even if you're not in Canada.

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Are you there?

Hi KU
U've got everything right.
Getting the best of both the worlds.
Go for it.

ciao

Hi KU

I too am applying for Canada. I however am in my 30s and my husband and I are doing very well here in the Middle East. We have 2 children, 4 years and 2 years so our children are quite young. We were talking the other day about children who move to Canada/US. You know at an early age, children move into that system and are able to adjust over the years. HOwever older children especially teenagers moving from a controlled environment ( you must be having some sort of rules with respect to clothing, religion, friends, alchohol, drugs, sex) to a totally open free society whereby anything goes. You see children in this age group lose their identity and therefore want to break free from that shell they have been living in for the first 16-17 years of their lives. In addition, I know of children, who move away from home, early pregnancies, situations of alcohol and drug use etc. You have the opportunity to stay with your daughter and be her mental support don't lose out just because of money. 10 years from now your daughter might have a whole new view of parents and what they mean. We strive so hard for our children to give them the best but in the end do they give back to their parents. Don't make a mistake by leaving her on her own. I am not saying you should go there to 'POLICE' her but only to be her support as a friend, parent, mentor which I know is especially useful. And as these children mature they grow and mold into perfect human beings with good moral values. It might seem like an adventure for your daughter to go off and study alone and stay at university residences alone but remember there is alot of peer pressure and other tension that students must face.

This is only my opinion, you still will make the final decision.

Belle! Good Luck and mostly good luck to your daughter.

Hi Kuwaituser,

I could find only two 'flaws' in the otherwise perfect post.

(1) You have given undue weightage to negative views expressed on the canadiandesi.ca and your friends. We as human beings have long memories for 'downs' and short for 'ups' of life. That perhaps has pushed you to take a more defensive position.

Appeal to Desis: It would be a good idea that some of the successful desis should write about themselves to enable new comers to make an informed decision.

(2) You have given very high importance to 'money' as against 'emotional' investment in your daughter. You should think which is more important for you and your family in the long run.

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Man's Best Friend

Continue to work in kuwait till your daugter finishes her Canadian university . Then when she finds a job in Canada you move to canada. Because in Canada you cannot save a single dollar.

your montly expenses are 2500 to 3000 dollars.

so you will spend all you earn if you manage to get a good job.

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"Ever dance with the devil in the pale moon light?"
"I always ask that of all my prey."
"I just like the sound of it."

I think you can even reniew your PR card after every five years, before the expiry, if you are in canada at that time. Actually you can get your five years multiple visa renewed after every five years. Get more info on this part as well.

Good luck for your plans

Dear desi friends,

I would like to thank all of you for your feed back and advise.

As my friends pointed out 10 to 15 years is a long time to plan, as we cannot predict the world situation then. However, as human beings we always tend to plan our future, but ultimately it is in god’s hand and he decides how he wants to shape our future.

Middle East, specially Kuwait is a great place now but nobody can predict what the situation will be here after 10 or 15 years, in any case we cannot predict how Canada will be after 10 years, so I have chosen what is better right now.

Belle has pointed out the dangers of exposing a 16 or 17 year old who has lived in a protected environment in the Middle East, to the western world. Well, as far as my daughter is concerned as Bhishma mentioned, I believe and with full confidence I can say that her moral values, traditions and religious beliefs which we have inculcated in her since her childhood will hold her in good stead even if she is left alone in the bad wild world. However I have my sister and brother in Canada and lots of family friends who will support her for her immediate needs. In any case my daughter is very level-headed, independent and is more like a friend to me. Since her teen years I made sure to be part of her peer group and I hope to develop the same sort of rapport with her future friends in the university. The world has advanced so much with the arrival of internet-mail/chatting, mobiles etc. such that we can keep track of the day to today activities of anyone we want anywhere in the world, a far cry from what it was in 1930 when the Father of our Nation and many other who left the country for their higher edcuation abroad. When my daughter enters university she will be 18+ and nearing 19 year, an age where you expect your children to be responsible. Regarding drugs, early pregnancies etc. as Belle mentioned, do you think this will not be an issue if we stay in Canada, of course all these can happen to children who are staying with their parents in the same home. It is up to us, the parents how we guide our children and maintain our relationship with our children and I cannot agree that children who are bought up in the western world since their birth will not be facing such problems. As I mentioned, Children stay in university residencies even if their parents are in Canada, because it is much easer to stay there rather than traveling home.

In any case I do not intend sending my daughter to Canada and sit back and relax thinking my responsibility is over, well she will be visiting us during all her vacations and we will be visiting her in Canada during the said 10 or 15 years. We are treating this just as if we are sending her to India or the US for her higher education. The other alternative is to keep her in Kuwait and ask her to do a correspondence course from India and graduate, which will be ruining her life. We have to trust our children as our parents have trusted us.

Yours truly have written that I have given high importance to money as against emotional investment. Well, emotional support can be provided to anyone only if we have a strong and close relationship with that person and it is neither necessary to have an emotional bond with your children even if they are staying with you in the same house nor it is impossible to have a close relationship with your child because they are staying away from you.

Money is equally important and if god wills I intend retiring early in life rather than working till I am 65 years.

Imran Ali's suggestion is very good regarding renewing the PR after five years. I thought the PR automatically expires if we do not stay in Canada for 2 years out of the 5 year period. Can anyone please explain this.